Since I was about 6, I have been considered ‘chubby.’ I always had to wear clothes that weren’t for my age group. So at 6 I wore clothes that were for 7 or 8 year olds, even then it was a struggle. And my god did my family tease me. I don’t think I was that bothered by it as a kid, I was just really aware that I was fat. And that it was a bad thing. (It isn’t)
And then I reached 12 years old and since then my stomach has been my biggest insecurity. Literally… Along with other parts of my body, naturally. When I got changed I would do it so quickly and I wouldn’t stand in front of a mirror because I was afraid of what I’d see. That, my dear friends, was a big mistake. Because I can recommend nothing more highly that actually stopping and looking at yourself in the mirror while in your underwear (or naked??) to improve your self-esteem and perception of yourself. Why? Because you can see what your body actually looks like and hopefully realise it’s not as bad as you thought. Our brains naturally tend to go straight to the worst case scenario, mine definitely did. All those years I avoided my body, my brain was making awful assumptions and was making me seem so much worse than I actually was.
But I’ve learnt not to hate my stomach a much as I used to, I’m not sure what has come over me. I, of course, still have days where I’d rather the stomach pudge wasn’t there but it’s not as extreme as it used to be. I’ve embraced the pudge, to an extent. I think it’s because I decided I was going to focus on the parts of my body I do like. I like my legs and my boobs, my butt could use some work but we’ll get there eventually!
I’m still learning to love my body, but I’ve come a long way.
Until next time 🙂